Nicole vs. Life
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.