There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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