She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
