If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize
