they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
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