I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
God, I missed his penis.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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