I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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