she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Randomize
