I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
