Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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