The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
