I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
