you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Randomize
