Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
