How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
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