Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman