If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
false alarm, still single
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