haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
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