mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
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