she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Randomize