The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
