I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
