i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
