I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize