Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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