69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
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