Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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