I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
