its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
