Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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