Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
