I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize
