im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
