yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
