Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
