I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
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