There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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