Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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