Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
