quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Randomize