I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Oh god it's open bar.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
