i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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