you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
and she was petting her beer can
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
