I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
