Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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