I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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