The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
they need to just BURY HIM!
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
