I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I look better un-naked...
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
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