Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Randomize
