you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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