Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
The Olympian is in my bed
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
