i'm lost and i look like a hooker
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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