And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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